Please, for the love of all that is holy, don't be an idiot.
Don't pretend to be ditzy.
Don't act like you've never played the game before.
Don't just stare at me blankly.
DON'T BE STUPID.
That's my only expectation of you at the moment. Can you handle that?
Can you handle doing what you're supposed to do on a soccer field?
Is it too much to ask you to actually run? To defend a player?
To chase after a ball that's 10 feet away from you?
To want to be out there playing soccer?
If you want to call yourself a soccer player, then play the game.
Do what your coaches tell you, and don't rely on inexperience as an excuse.
Move those legs that God gave you and run.
If you don't want to play, then why are you wasting your time?
Why are you wasting my time? Get off the field.